Up and to the Right - issue #6

Welcome to the newly designed Up and to the Right!

Hello, hello! I'm so excited to start this newsletter off with a few announcements. But first, if you have received this from someone who forwarded it to you (thanks to them! And click subscribe below so you keep on getting these amazing inbox treats in the weeks to come!)

• We are getting a makeover 💄 - ok not really that kind but Up and to the Right is looking a little spiffier this month and going forward will be gracing your inbox twice a month instead of once! It's 2x more fun and 2x more leadership talk - what could be better than that?

• Scoop alert 🚨 : Your humble newsletter author, ahem, is going big time. I have been invited to do a regular column in the newsletter Sidekick. You heard it here first so if you aren't already a subscriber, go check it out and join the fun. But don't worry - you're still my favorite.

• I recently had the opportunity to talk with Supermanagers podcast 🎙 all about leadership and there's even a tie to this issue's main topic. Maybe you want to check it out? 👀👇

Let's talk about empathy!

Empathy is all about putting yourself in others' shoes. You might be thinking, "right, and I do that". Do you really though? Really? Don't go hating on me here - I'm honestly not trying to put you on the spot (plus you're reading this days after I wrote it in the comfort of your own space so....) but empathy is way harder to display than it is to pay homage to.

In fact, I remember when quite early in my management career, my boss and a person who would eventually become a mentor to me, pulled me aside. She said, "do yourself a favor, ask about your team's weekend every once in a while". It caught me off guard but it struck a chord. I was so focused on getting the work done, was never good at small talk, and thought it was easier to just stay on topic. And, it was easier (for me) but it was also problematic.

I see this is some of my high performing, ambitious, coaching clients too - a strict separation of church (life) and state (work) that can result in a lack of interpersonal connection. I get it, that separation can be a very good thing and I respect that. You don't have to be best friends with everyone you work with (arguably, you shouldn't be in fact) but that doesn't mean you can't lead with empathy.

Why should we care about empathy?

Well first, it's really needed. A recent global study from the firm Qualtrics found a reported 42% of people have experienced declining mental health and 54% consider themselves emotionally exhausted.

But it isn't just that's its needed, it's also powerful.

According to the CCL, empathy in the workplace is positively correlated to performance. Not only were empathic leaders seen as more effective but those who rated their boss as empathic were also seen as high performing.

Bottom line? Being an empathic leader is being a more effective leader, especially now.

How to become more empathetic as a leader?

The key to practicing empathy as a leader comes from a lesson you learned in kindergarten! Be nice. But of course, niceness isn't as simple as it was when it meant sharing your cookie. So try these three tips to increase your empathy as a leader.

• Watch for signs of burnout. This is probably an important part of empathetic leadership all the time but never more so than today. With the stresses of always-on media cycles, political and social strife, work-life shifts, and the pandemic, burnout is very, very real. Signs include: suddenly becoming overly cynical, dip in performance of a usually high performing individual, and missing deadlines. Ask about workloads, look to rebalance among the team if possible and re-prioritize if not. Just the act of paying attention to this will be appreciated.

• Listen more carefully. I know, you've heard it before but even still, how good a listener are you? Do you find yourself sneaking peeks at your phone or quickly answering a Slack message? Give your team their time and really listen. Staying focused not only makes you more empathic, it also increases the likelihood of having productive conversations that minimize confusion and miscommunication.

• Seek out full participation. We are all moving so fast these days. With looming deadlines and growing to-do lists, it's no wonder we don't always seek out the ideas and thoughts of those who may not be the loudest. Take a moment in key discussions to directly ask for input from those that may be more likely to let the louder folks dominate. It not only increases the chances of getting more great ideas onto the proverbial table, it also demonstrates a commitment to maximizing the potential of the entire team. Win-win!

Read more about empathy...

Adding a new section to the email this issue, a featured expert is someone I think has interesting takes on leadership. You might want to check them out, give them a follow, and keep on learning!

Well that's it folks! I am so excited to share more with you in the week's ahead. In the meantime - remember sharing is caring - so share this with a friend (or ten!).

Lead on,